The best candidate

ARTHAS MENETHIL FOR PRESIDENT OF AZEROTH

The Lich King wrote:

As I’ve traveled across Azeroth I’ve looked around and seen that people are scared. I’ve shaken hands with people who have said to me “Holy %&*! My hand!” But I want them to know that they don’t have to be scared anymore. In fact, when I am President, It will be one of my highest priorities that each and every Azerothian is granted full immunity to fear. But some say that is not enough. So let me tell you where I stand on the issues.

The Economy:

Times are tough. The price of netherweave is down. The cost of repairs is up. Joe the Shaman is concerned about whether or not he will have a spot in 25 person raids. But if you look at your fellow Azerothians, you’ll see that the solution is all around you. It’s a fact that Kalimdor and the Eastern Kingdoms together have over 87% of the world’s supply of souls. It is time to harness that supply. I do not want to use a scalpel or a hatchet, but a runesword. I believe in the trickle-down theory. When my blade slices through each of your bellies and your innards trickle down onto the icy battlefield, your soul - that has gone untapped for so many years - will finally be absorbed and utilized. Drain, Baby, Drain.

Healthcare

I know one of the biggest issues each of you face is healthcare. The average Azerothian spends more time looking at his/her healthbar than any other stat. Over the last four years, my opponents have watched as healing was completely stripped away from items. The liberal media will tell you that spell power does the exact same thing, but these are the same people that told you Arenas were fun.

The solution is one that has worked for The Scourge for years. The answer is not in reform but in reanimation. Ask any of my supporters and they will tell you they have no concern for their health. And those concerned with the time it takes to run back to their corpses will be happy to know that I will make the world one mass graveyard.


Global Warming

Ahahahaha. Ehem. I have that one covered.

My Running Mate

There have been some pretty nasty rumors about my running mate. The fact is he simply has an unfortunate name. I assure you, Kel’Thuzad is not a muslim, nor is he a terrorist.
He was a member of the high council of Kirin Tor and a citizen of Dalaran. When blood still flowed in his veins it was the same blood that, for the time being, still flows through all of yours.

I am Arthas and WE APPROVE THIS MESSAGE.

I cut out the parts that weren't really that funny.

P.S. in before blah blah RP more blah blah blah

Petrus wrote:

Quote :

Global Warming

I cut out the parts that weren't really that funny.

P.S. in before blah blah RP more blah blah blah

So did I.
p.s. just kidding, would read again

I lol'ed.